Waco – Nick Adams wouldn't be surprised if somehow, someday, they shaved the east and west coasts off the American continent.
His answer came in response to a very conservative member of the Waco Tea Party quizzing him about how he finds the U.S. government's chances to return to its original roots as a constitutional republic with very limited powers.
His answer brought the house down. People laughed because it hurts too much to refrain from laughter.
Like the French journalist Alexis de Tocqueville who toured the fledgling American republic before him – way before him, in the 18th century – Lt. Adams of the Australian Army admires America and all things American.
He's authored a sequel to Mssr. De Tocqueville's 4-volume survey of America; the title - “America: The Greatest Good” - which tells the story of this 26-year-old Aussie's fascination with what he considers the only really value-driven, purpose-driven nation on Earth.
When he speaks in these terms, he becomes reverent, his tones respectful of what he fancies his ideal, the American system of government, particularly as practiced by conservatives.
His answer to the lady's question: “What you need is another Reagan.”
Listen to his recollection of the time when Australians voluntarily took their firearms to police stations and surrendered them so the government could destroy them - melt them down and make them into something else besides a firearm to use as a weapon to fend off attacks by people who get stupid and get violent.
He was 12 years old, but he remembers well what prompted the odd occurrence in which “The most conservative Australian Prime Minister in Australian history was also the same Prime Minister who took away our guns...Every day, ordinary Australians went to the police station and said, 'Here are my guns.'”
He paused for effect.
“That wouldn't happen here.”
The meeting room at the West Waco Public Library burst into giddy laughter.
As it happened, in 1996, a schizophrenic named Martin Bryant escaped from a mental institution, went home and got his assault rifle and attacked innocent people. When he was through, he left 36 people dead.
The crowd turned somber again.
On a previous trip to America, he contacted the company that manufactures Daisy Air Rifles, located at Rogers, Arkansas, and requested a tour of the factory and the opportunity to learn and observe from their industrial methods.
They gave him the chance to fabricate and assemble his own Red Rider air rifle, something he did gratefully.
The problem was simple enough. He couldn't take it back into Australia with him when he returned.
Not a problem, according to the people at Daisy. They would deactivate the toy gun – it fired BB's like all Red Riders that came before – and ship it to him at home in Sydney.
That's when the got this strange call from Australian Customs.
They had an illegal weapon; it was addressed to him, said a bureaucratic voice on the other end of the line.
He explained it was for display only, that he could not fire it because it had no inner workings to propel the BB's.
Could he keep it?
Sure, no problem. All he had to do was apply for a gun license; apply for a safety license; get them both approved and issued to him; have a government-approved gunsmith stamp a number on the receiver of the little air rifle; obtain a gun safe; fill out 2 government forms to be kept on file with police and government agencies; submit to police inspections and searches at any time; and, of course, drop by the cop shop every three months to let the officers inspect the “weapon.” Oh, did I mention that the Red Rider signature model air rifle could not be displayed on Lt. Adams' wall? He would be required to keep it in the gun safe at all times.
The Legendary didn't have the heart to ask him how all that came out.
The question had been that, knowing the government took all the firearms away from Australians, what did he think it would take to get the right to keep and bear arms back.
Somehow, his answer filled the request - with overkill.
Though Australia emerged from the worldwide financial collapse of 2008 in better shape than most nations, the prospects for the Australian future are not too bright, he told Tea Partiers.
For instance, since the nation is in the middle of a mining boom, the Socialist government installed by Parliament is seriously considering the imposition of a mining tax on mine owners.
Does Australia have an inordinate debt to China? No, he replied, but not to worry. China is the least stable of all nations, especially in Asia.
“China doesn't even have a navy...No superpower has ever ruled the world without ruling its oceans. America does; Britain did at one time.”
He shrugged, gratefully began to sign copies of his book, which is available through Amazon.com
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